No One Can Tell You What You Are Capable Of

Today, I have realized that no one knows you better than you.

As I am writing this blog post, I am overjoyed and also very emotional. I just finished my 6th semester in college and received my unofficial final grades. If you have read my previous blog posts or you have heard me talk about college, you will know that college has been more than difficult for me. My first semester, I was dealing with all the issues with my Dysautonomia (here) and had a difficult time in my classes. I ended that first semester with a GPA that I am not proud of by any means, but I also think it shows how awful my health was and how far I have come. (Here is the blog post after my first year in college.) Over the past 6 semesters, I have had my fair share of people telling me I am doing everything all wrong. I have had countless advisors, professors, and friends tell me that I am not making the right decisions. 

I started out my first semester taking NINETEEN hours. I was told to do so by my advisor, and I feel he was irresponsible and did not take his students seriously. He just wanted to get us in and get us out as fast as he could. For a student like me, that did not go over well and I am so glad I do not have him anymore. I started out a Psychology major and once I took my first Upper Division course,Thinking and Cognitive Processes. This course was beyond hard and way over my head. I realized that Psychology probably was not the best route for me to go. 

The Spring 2015 semester, I was not in school. While I was away that semester, I had quite a bit of changes happening in my life. I moved back home, worked part time, and tried to find what I wanted to do considering school. I wrote this blog post about the pressure high school seniors have to go to college and to get a degree. I was realizing that college may not be for everyone, including me. At this time, I was deciding if I wanted to go back to Memphis, try and get a full time job or go to Real Estate school, and taking care of my health. A few months later, I decided to go back to Memphis (here) and I am so glad I made that decision.

That next semester, I decided to go back part time. I took 3 classes that were only on Tuesday's and Thursdays. I was there from 9:20-2:05 with no breaks in between. I was still going to school but I had lots of time to focus on health and taking care of my body. I believe that it has played a huge role in my well being and I am getting so much better every day. My grades were finally starting to get better with this new schedule so I continued to go Tuesday and Thursday with only 3 classes.

I just finished my 6th semester, only taking 9 hours but the classes were Monday-Thursday. Before this semester, I met with my cousin, who is the Assistant Dean of the University College, and she talked with me about their Child Development and Family Studies major. All three courses that I took were for this major and I loved every single one of them. I took Intro to Child Development and Family Studies, Family Global Perspective, and Integrative Curriculum for Early Learners. These were by far my favorite classes so far. By the middle, closer to the end of the semester, I went in and changed my major to Child Development and Family Studies. I am so happy because I have found the place where I belong. I found the department and classes that I am passionate about!!

College has been so far from easy for me but I am so happy where I am and I am so proud of myself because I MADE STRAIGHT A'S THIS SEMESTER! I am so so so proud of myself and I just want to encourage you to never let anyone tell you what you are not capable of. You are you and no one knows you better than you know yourself. I have had to gather up my emotions and hurt feelings when I have been told that "You are not going to graduate on time" or "you know you have to take at least 12 hours to be considered full time.." I know all of these things but I also know myself and I have found what works for me and what doesn't. I know what school load my body can handle and when I need to cut it off. I want to thank everyone who has helped me and encouraged me to keep going and to not give up on myself. My parents, my family, my best friend, Sara, and a few others who mean so much to me, have pushed me to keep going and to try my very hardest.

God is so good and He has helped give me the strength each and every day to keep going even when it feels like the world is against me.

If you are having a hard time, keep going, push yourself to what you know you are capable of. You can do it, if I can get straight A's, you can do it too!! I have faith in you :)

Thank you again to everyone who has encouraged me all along the way, I could not have done it without you!!!!


-Steph

Living Like A Child Of God

 

Last night, I experienced something truly amazing and eye opening.
I was babysitting for this family that I truly adore. They have two little girls, 2 & 4 years old. As I was putting the oldest to bed, she reminded me that we had to say our prayers.
I prayed first then I sat and listened as this precious 4 year old girl was talking and having a conversion with our Heavenly Father. Even though she was very quiet and I missed some of the words, it was the sweetest thing I have ever heard.

As I was driving home, I began to think about why as we grow up, we stray away from having childlike faith? Why do we suddenly think that we know better and become selfish in many aspects of our life? God NEVER changes, He is still the same as He was years ago when we were young children. So what happened?

Children are very interesting (or at least to me.) They LOVE to be independent but they also rely so much on the adults around them. They love to make decisions on their own like what clothes to wear, or what they want to drink in their sippy cup, but they solely rely on their parents to give them the things they need. How can we, as children of God, live in such a way that we are like young children? God is calling and reaching out to us to just trust Him! Why is that so hard for us?

In Matthew 18, verses 3 & 4, Jesus says
             "I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. So anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven"

Maybe you are like me, I really need to learn to trust God wholeheartedly with every part of my life. I want to be like a young child again, and run into the arms of Jesus. I need Jesus, I need Him to take over my life, I need to stop being selfish and only giving Him the parts of my life that I want to. Are you like this? If so, join me this week and really striving to live with childlike faith. Run into your Father's arms and give Him every part of your life. We need to stop focusing on "who can have the best prayer in sunday school" or "who sounds more knowledgeable," we just need to worry about living a life that is glorifying God!


Steph

Christ > "Mr. Right"

Recently, there have been marriages, engagements, and new relationships everywhere. I feel like every day there is another person I know that is getting engaged or having a baby. It's very exciting but also makes you question where God is taking your life. 

I recently wrote a blog post a few months back about writing and journaling to Mr. Right. Since then, I have struggled a little more than usual about what God has planned for me. Honestly, I haven't been journaling & writing letters to him anymore because sometimes I really wonder if there will be a Mr. Right. I feel like right now college is such a hard placed in life to try and find your soulmate. On campus, there are potential guys everywhere, walking around, in your classes, or in line behind you at the UC. But none of them have the same goals as I do. It seems like guys are just ready for a one night stand hook up type deal, or they are all about frat parties and drinking. And to me, that's not something I'm looking for. I'm looking for someone who will bring out the best in me, someone who will read the Bible with me and help me grow in my relationship with Christ but also will spend occasional Friday nights talking and binge watching Netflix. Right now, I have a lot physically going on that I need someone to help support me with.  I feel like recently, God has just been really taking a hold of my heart and putting back together all the broken pieces while telling me that even though everyone around me seems to be worried about relationships, that it's not what I need to be doing. I can be happy for my friends but also be happy for where God has me at the moment. I'm excited for where the road takes me, I know it will be great because I know who holds my future. And I am PERFECTLY okay with that :) It breaks my heart seeing girls recently settling for someone who doesn't help them grow, someone who doesn't cherish them and they stay with them just because the fear of being lonely and single.

Girls, join me and allowing God to take over our hearts let's grow deeper in Him and let him prepare us to give our hearts to someone who will cherish us and be honored to have us. Stop settling for guys who do the opposite. God has a plan and let's rejoice and be glad it in! :)
I hope this encourages you to not try and find happiness in just any guy but in the One who holds our future in His hands.

lots of love, Steph

Sunny & 75

This past week, my family has been in Gulf Shores, Alabama for our annual beach trip! It was my parents, sister, and my grandparents. My sister brought her best friend and I brought my cousin, Melissa. It was so much fun and very relaxing! We went from Tuesday-Tuesday because of my moms work schedule. we had 6 people staying in a one bedroom condo. My grandparents stayed in their camper at the Gulf State Park. Poor dad, once again he was forced to stay with 5 girls for 7 full days with ONE bathroom. He was a trooper though, as always :)


We did our yearly traditions of during the day we spent our time at the pool and the beach, then we head up one by one to shower and get ready for dinner. We then go out to dinner which follows by a trip to Scoops, our favorite ice-cream place in Gulf Shores. One morning during our visit, we always head to the Track. The Track is a go-kart place that has a huge family favorite, the Woody. It's a huge 3 story wooden track that is AWESOME! This trip was so relazing, I just loved being able to sit at the pool & beach listening to music or reading my book! 

One night we went to Wolf Bay Lodge & I was scared for life. As we were leaving, we out of the peer to take pictures (like every group of white girls.) Near us was a group of about 10-12 people and all these young boys were holding fish. Fish that didn't even look real might I add. We were standing under some great picture scenery, like rope and stakes, taking beautiful pictures then a group of men and boys come up pushing a cart full of fish (again they looked fake) they asked if it's okay if they used the area we were standing in because they needed the "decorations" So we backed away and I really wanted to watch. Well, without ANY warning, the man picks up the fish one by one and swinging them onto the stakes to hang them. The stakes were going into their eye balls and fish eye guts were flying everywhere. I was completely disgusted and ran off crying because I couldn't believe my eyes. The rest of the night I felt so queasy and weak like I was going to get sick. One of the worst experiences of my life. Bleh

I caved and got something I never said I would. A SELFIE STICK. And it's awesome!!!! It is so convenient when you don't have someone to take a picture for you!!

It was such a nice vacation to spend with my family away from work and everything else going on!! After a few days, I really really missed my babies. I couldn't wait to go back to work, I know I sound so crazy! It was a much needed 7 day vacation though!! I was ready to come home though. 

xoxo guys - Steph

Small Step For Organization

Do you remember my post at the beginning of the year talking about my goals for the upcoming year? Yeah? Well, one of my goals was to work on my organization. I have really really been trying to work hard on organizing my life. No one seems to believe me but at work, I try to keep the classroom as clean as possible (I work at a daycare in case you didn't know.) It's really hard in a room full of 2 year olds, but I am constantly walking behind them cleaning up the pile of toys that they just love to dump out for fun, and probably because they know it drives me insane :-) Whenever I bring this up at home, the only response I receive is laughter. Mom doesn't believe me, my nana doesn't believe me, my sister doesn't believe me. But only because that's just never been me. God didn't give me much of the Martha lifestyle, I am more like Mary. With that being said, it is really hard for me to not only organize, but to stay organized.

Since we moved to our new house about two years ago, I went to college and lived in the dorms & apartment. I never really had the chance to "live" in my new house/room. Since I moved back home, I have really been in the process our redoing my room (even though it was never really "done") I will do a room tour when I am done! But anyways, I have been trying to organize everything. 

One thing I have been working on is my makeup stash ;) I have been really big into makeup, like as in a hobby, so I've been organizing it the best I can.

I started out using my bathroom for my makeup and this is what my bathroom looked like 24/7. It was so messy and unorganized. It started to stress me out so I had to do something to change that. 

For now, this is my new makeup area! I'm still getting used to it though. My room is on the backside of the house and there are trees in our backyard so I don't get very much sunlight which is not good for doing your makeup. So if you see me with makeup not blended in, thats why ;)

I fought these grey tins from Target (my holy grail store) for pretty cheap. Heres the link if you would like to check them out. They have a think 3 sizes or maybe 2. I have the small & medium. They are so awesome and they are super cute!! 

In the medium sized one, I have most of my makeup organized. I have three smaller organizer tins inside. I have them organized by foundations, random little things  (eyeliner, eyeshadows, blush, primers), & then lipsticks! 

This new system has made getting ready so much easier! Instead of digging through a makeup bag trying to find everything I need, now I can find it more easily than I could before. Now for my brushes, I just recently bought this awesome organizer from TJ MAXX, it has three sections. Two back ones and then another in the front. This has helped me organize my brushes in categories: face, eyes, and small travel size brushes/beauty blenders. The next things on my list that I want to buy are nail polish organizers and also I want a lipstick holder/organizer. 

So this has been my major project recently in getting my life organized!! I hope that this will maybe inspire you to organize your life too :)

-xoxoxo Steph

past 365 days

As of today, it has been a full year since I started my blog! I can't believe it. 

This blog has gone a lot further than I ever thought was possible. I have so many readers that have told me that they read every blog post and it just blows my mind! Thank you so much for reading and going along with me through the seasons of my life! I couldn't be more blessed.

I know recently I haven't been blogging much, and I'm hoping for that to change soon. Once I start back in school I think I will have more to write about. I'm so thankful that for some reason I decided to make a blog. I love the fact that I can go back whenever I want, years from now, and read about what was going on in my life from 2014 -->

Thank you for being patient as I have not been the best blogger recently, thank you for reading about my illness and being so encouraging that I will make it through the next few years, thank you for being interested about what I'm writing about, even though some parts are very very boring. Thank you for going along with my weird jokes that I add in to my posts, and thank you for just being you :)

I have the best family and friends, thank you for encouraging me through my seasons on life!

-Steph xoxo

Go Tigers Go

I am officially going back to the University of Memphis this fall!! 

I am so excited, there have quite a few obstacles that has gotten in the way but I am officially returning to school in the fall! Words can not describe how excited I am to go back. I want summer to hurry up so I can get back into the swing of things (i know don't rush it right? but who cares) These past few months have been really hard, I felt like the only human interaction I really had were with my two year olds, now don't get me wrong i LOVE them to death (maybe a little too much sometimes) but I am excited to get to be a "normal" college aged student and get to do everything again on campus.

I am taking Development Across Life Span, Literary Heritage, Intro to Theater, and Sociology. I'm really excited for Life Span because that is what I am really interested in!

I'm really happy to be able to share this exciting news with you! Go Tigers (eh too soon, GO VOLS)

Steph